In a "vision"* this morning (see end for my definition of vision) I was shown around the home where this amazing spirit died - or where she spent here last 5-1 year(s). It is an important message. First, the description so the intended target of the message can really know if it is the person they think it is. Please keep in mind, during such full-ranged communication, the spirit's message can have bits and pieces of my subconscious/unconscious(don't have the equipment or team to test which lol) and so some details may be off but the whole of the image is there. I would say 3/4 is the spirit, and 1/4 is me. I will say when I think it's mine.
In a hallway (about the length of a regular schoolbus) I walk from a dark part of the hallway ( the hallway is G on my crappy floorplan tablet sketch, the top is the lighter area, I come from the bottom area) to the light part and the door is on my right. I think there is a second door too, but it could be a closet inside the room. The hallway is neutral beiges, or that could be the sunlight/artifical light sources.
Upon entering the room, the bed (B on the floorplan) dominates the room, but there is also a long and hipheight dresser (A on floorplan) to my right, and (F) a smaller dresser on my left. There are two windows (E) on (I think South facing) the wall as well as a large painting (unsure) which is an oil painting of a historical urban or architectural scene. I think there are horses. In front of the window there is a big CRT (tube) TV - bulky and made in the mid to late 80's - on top of a small entertainment unit (c) which sits squat on the ground. The room is carpeted. Closer to the second door (or closet) is a floor lamp (D)
The bed is a twin size, for one person, but the bedspread looks like it was made for a double or queensized and it is draped, yet centered. Looks like the bed was made but someone thought about taking a nap. The bedspread has red floral or abstract plant designs in red, with gold (metallic) threading that gives it a sheen and makes it a little rough to the touch. As I "test" the bed by putting my hand and leaning on it, it is less comfortable than I imagined but still not an uncomfortable bed, but it is very low to the ground, the boxspring and mattress on the ground. There are offwhite, clean sheets on the bed, they look almost like they were ironed or just taken out of a new package. The pillow is fluffy but, like the mattress, it has a groove where the owner had slept there for a long time.
The windows have see-through curtains (I might be wrong but I also think there were other, thicker curtains) with possibly some pattern to it but it's hard to tell. There is a yellow/orange light coming through it which I see as either streetlight emanations or a sunset/sunrise light.
On the dresser are memetos and curios. I think they are on doilies but I am not sure. I especially recall this pitcher made of silver or silver plated or even pewter, skinny neck and big base, a frilly metalworked handle. I also see little things that look very Black Forest in design. Expensive things that don't necessarily look expensive. The more you look at them, the more you see details and mastercrafting, hallmarks etc - that show the value unseen on firt impression.
The paintings remind me of paintings my grandparents have - well done in a slight impressionistic flare better seen from afar, of wealthy places and somehow it looks ugly to me. Victorian urban scenes with rich Victorians and wet streets, people with umbrellas.. but you can never see their faces as the impressionistic tilt of the painting only does details on things like horse bridles, ropes on ships, and clocks on clock towers. They are done by prossionals that don't care for the subject, but more the brushstrokes, the mastery. These paintings are important, but I am unsure.
What really weirds me out is in the piece of furniture the clunky TV is on. A tape recorder/player. It is too big for the shelf it is on. There is a lot of clutter on the shelf, the player, the VHS machine, books, little magazines like Reader's Digest or New Yorker or Betty and Veronica size-wise, and papers. Maybe some puzzle books or notepads. I digress, but she is reminding me to describe this the best way I can, she didn't enter a brain/body filled with pain and symptoms for nothing. She hated it hehehe. Why do I laugh at that? Maybe it's nice to share my sickness with someone? Segue done.
She plays the tape recording all of a sudden, pressing the play button makes a CLACK sound and I am surprised. It's people talking. It's a little echoey and poor quality, but I think it's at least mostly men, grown men. I turn it off to restore some of my calm, but it starts playing again. The TV turns on, the imagine quality is poor, there is a greenish tint and the frame is askew at the top and a bit at the bottom. It, too, surprises me. Both things disturb me more than they should, and that is part of the message.
It's hard to see the spirit unt now, but she comes to me, angry or upset. She is older, at least 70, and she is urgent and intense. I think she has dark, mousey brown/grey hair with silver hairs peppering, I think she has a braid or ponytail down her neck to her shoulder blades but it's hard to tell as she is slouched over in her upset pose. Her eyes are a grey with hints of other colours hard to certainly distinguish as they are milky, hazy - for effect I assume, however it could be a symptom of her illness?
The rest of the place was rather large, many bedrooms (8 I counted, but didn't see the whole house), many wooden architectural features - so beautiful and honeyed, varnished marvellously. There is pride in this house, pride maintained but detached due to death, and before that - sickness.
Most of the message was enigmatically hidden in the feeling of the room, indeed the whole of the house. Many questions arose in my mind, and I asked them as I wrote this article. First I work on interpreting the "vision" she enrobed me in, then I try verbal contact with the messenger. She went to a lot of trouble to give this message - and as the medium, it is a medium's duty to process the images and sensations before questioning - otherwise we show a lack of respect, preparedness, intelligence and most of all: empathy. She went against her worst fear to deliver this, the fear of being sick again. She felt my sickness and it tormented her with the memories of her illness. Mediums need to respect the spirit. The message might be time sensitive, they might not have time to find another medium with the means to broadcast their message. So now, the interpretation.
1. Why was she so upset?
She wanted me out of her home, not touching her things. She was angry I was doing that. The medium's position in the vision is usually a message in itself - usually in the role of the person for whom the message is aimed, or for who the emotions are aimed. It felt like since her death (or the death of the person she speaks for - but I am almost sure it is her) people are shopping through her things. What they want to take home, what they are "owed", what they could sell for some quick cash. The feeling of scrutinizing the items for value was a big theme. Like that silvery jug with the important hallmark and fancy workmanship. I also got the feeling the people viewing the objects for their monetary value don't know half the importance, let alone price, of the items they covet. It's easy to judge these people by reading this, but it is a complex emotion she was trying to transmit. The person was starting out on a new venture and could use the money, she knows this, but she wants the person to get the full value for the item they wish to pawn. If it must be taken, at least get your money's worth. She also showed me others doing the same thing, but hiding in a closet - and she wanted them (a couple was included in this closet) out of the closet. To me, this means she'd rather people be open, honest - most important, no sanctimony or self-righteous delusions about their aims and feelings. She knows exactly how they feel. There is no hiding from her now as they did in her life. She remembers every last detail now, she tells me as I type this. You want to pawn her stuff for money - okay. Stop beating around the bush and do it! She hates the cat and mouse games, the lies, the betrayals, and mostly what the money has done to her loved ones. Enough is enough, dammit!
2. Why was she in the room so much?
She says she was feeble (as I started to interpret, she is now watching me type on a tablet with great interest - "I want you to get the story straight, I appreciate your repsect") and her mind was changing. It was like looking at the world from a carousel: dizzying, confusing, moving too fast, too loud. In her toso, below the left lung (or perhaps in the left lung) she had pain, heaviness, pressure. Also like a heartburn feeling but in the wrong place, her torso was thick feeling inside - sick and wrong. "My insides were melting and stirring that's how it felt." Cancer, I am almost sure that's what she had. But it's nothing I've seen before, it's highly perplexing. She didn't know, her mind did not retain, but she would like to know what it was in order to learn more about it. We all want to help the cause that captured us, right?
3. What is the tape recorder about? "They were all strangers to me, I had a little security just in case. They didn't know, but I recorded them. The tape is hidden, I've seen it safe after my death." Her mind was so much clearer after death, she was let out of her cage. It will be safe. She has met a few mediums alread.
4. Does she have a specific, verbal message? "Stop fighting, stop pretending. Stop circling around me and just do what you have to. It's hard on me, but I don't have a choice. We can talk about it." I will help you talk with her, I am not asking for anything in return, this woman has given me the gift of such a potent vision, fun and enjoyable. I do love a good horror-movie nightmare (so long as it doesn't involve my beloveds), but only if it's while I dream, and she has promised a doozey. She wants to talk, communicate, that's the second part. She knows you all are not villains, and not to be ashamed. She is happier and freer now, if a little homesick for the physical life, without the sickness of course. She is an amazing woman with so much to offer in terms of wisdom and experiences, and I look forward to communicating with her for a long time.
If this is aimed at you, mail me and I will do what I can. Even if you don't want to talk to her, please mail so I can at least distinguish what is my bias in the vision from the message. It is essential to my continued honing of skills and sensitivity, so I will be grateful. But know, she loves you and her mind has returned to a stable and young etat which enables her to remember all the good times, all the things you sacrificed, all the moments you shared. You might be surprised of what she says.
Although I am oft sick and unable to write, my health could be worse. She reminded me of that, even though I frequently use it as a mantra to get through hard times - I needed reminding. We can feel pity for ourselves, and it can be briefly therapeutic.. but like alcohol, drugs, gambling, and other addictive substances and activities: pout responsibly or it'll lead you to a dark place of feeling like you are worse off than all the rest. When people ignore you or seclude you due to your frequent griping - you may want to speak louder to get more attention. The louder, the quieter. They will ignore more and more until they are desensitized, so that when you need help, you will feel neglected and spiteful and alone. Her message here is a warning to me, as she sees darker times for me before the illness eases - but I share it as I think it is applicable to all of us in some degree. She lived through it, and in death - found a way to make some positive out of the negative. She assume responsability for her part, and even though there is bitterness, she forgives others for theirs.
* "Vision" is an impotent word for what these things really are. Spirits will pull your entire consciousness into their experience. Imagine you are actually standing in this room, you can smell the smells, hear the sounds, touch anything in the room, and sometimes even taste the food! It is my favorite type of vision and occurs when your mind is clear, calm, and open. They have access to your thoughts, and it may be very scary at times but it is amazing to behold and much more importantly: communication is done at an alarmingly intimate and yet saturating way. It takes training because, just like lucid dreaming, sometimes when you realize it's happening you get either too scared or excited and you kick the spirit out before the message is relayed. That can be very disturbing for the spirit, frustrating and confusing.
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Location:Does This Room Look Familiar?