My disease makes me feel pain all day every day. I feel it in my sleep, in my dreams, and it wakes me up on a nightly basis. Sometimes, that pain goes through the roof, and I am left in bed, shaking and writhing, waiting for the bout of extreme pain to end. I don't get depressed, I don't "feel" any emotions, I just look forward to the pain being over.
Spirits get curious. They tell me that when pain spikes higher than average, they sense it from great distances, and they feel exhilarated, curious, and want to see what's going on. Family spirits of course are the first on the scene, but gradually more and more spirits will come and visit me. Usually this comforts me. I know I'm never, ever, alone. There's always someone around me, dead or alive.
Spirits' pain also is a beacon to me, as I can sense them more when they're upset. Which can sometimes be bad. When spirits are REALLY pissed off, I can get dizzy, sick, faint, shaky, or even feel the pain myself - that is, I can get angry, depressed, anxious, etc. This is one of the major ways I can interpret spirits, by their "reflected" emotions. It's not always perfect, as there will be an interpretation bias, but it sure speeds up communication if the spirit is having problems. However, it's hard when people want "proof" I'm real, and don't tell me their loved one was violently killed... and I start choking or feel like there's a knife in my chest. Good times. I totally understand, however, and never blame people for not telling me. I hate fake mediums too. Of course, there are fake mediums, and then there are crazy people who hear their illnesses and not ghosts. I don't hate crazy people, it's not their fault - and who am I to say that they aren't the real deal? They might just not interpret it properly, or ghosts might be haunting them, playing with them. I hate those kinds of ghosts. Those joker ghosts, the Tinker Ghosts, are attracted to the pain spikes too... but after a while you get to tell the difference between a trickster and a genuine being. Sure they'll still try their pranks, but they won't get the better of you, they'll get tired and move on. Ouija is another great love of Tinker Ghosts. But these ghosts are for another post.
Some rituals focus on sacrifice or self mutilation for a reason: ghosts respond to pain more quickly than polite asking. Spirits react quickly to pain, but also to more happy things... like childrens' energy, like extreme joy, ecstasy, and sexual release. Anything intense. Ghosts tell me that each type of intense sensation has it's different "Feel". I asked if it's coloured, like a beam of light. Most say no, it's just a feeling, like the feel of warm sunshine on the skin compared to chilling gusts of wind on a wet head of hair. Each feeling has a different sensation, and some ghosts take a while to tell the difference.
Ghosts, most of them, will do ALL they can to comfort the person in pain. I have seen it in hospitals, in graveyards, in school: they surround the person in their being and think hard on positive thoughts, comforting thoughts, and if the person is open enough (regardless of them being a medium or not) they will sense this. People stop crying, stop clenching their teeth, and sense a joy - get a release of endorphins - or feel the presence of a loved one. This is the most heartwarming and potent things I have seen spirits do.
Alright I'm pooped, I just wanted to post something positive since I haven't posted in a long while ;)
This weblog documents my experience as someone who communicates with the dead. I will share as much as possible without revealing the person or people that commissioned me to speak with their loved one or loved ones.