He said his name to me, not written, so any spelling permutations of the name are possible. For the purposes of facility, I am using the spelling Kurt to name him in this article.
What Kurt Looks Like:
Shaved head, Caucasian (maybe mixed ethnicity, not sure), smiling face, muscular. Eyes were hard to see. He reminded me a lot of Vin Diesel looks-wise. He wasn't too tall but in no way short. Between 5"8-6"1. He had a duffel bag with him, old, means a lot to him. Blue, maybe black but aged to a blue tint - with red and maybe orange accents. Wide but skinny like a gym bag. Made of nylon.. reminds me of 80's style.
Personality:
Very friendly, very generous, very helpful. He likes to be free, moving, out in the open. He might have had difficulties staying in one place, I think he spent some time homeless. But his spirit is so amazing, potent. He attracted a lot of girls' attention, and was quite blunt (but honorable) in turning many of them down. It was hard to see his preference in women, almost randomly attracted to certain girls. He was generous - giving away time and money to help others. He is very open - but still manages a mysterious nature - a few choice secrets but the rest is open to the world. He treats people like extended family.
Misc Details:
He was known in his hometown and further a bit - for his athletic ability. Hockey I'm pretty sure. Maybe lacrosse. He loved sports, working out- his muscles were defined so I assume he was into lifting weights. He's Canadian, or spent a lot of time IN Canada. His accent would say he's either from Canada or the USA. Mid country for either I think. These things are hard to pin point.
The Message
Kurt's message was to his friends first - he's sorry he left them so young, but it was his time. He loved a brown haired firecracker, he wants everyone to know. But he wasn't as at ease with people as most thought. He was tortured at times by his claustrophobia being in homes, buildings. Sometimes people took it personally, he wants them to know it wasn't personal.
To his family AND friends: He hated being in enclosed spaces. Ever since he was a kid. I'd say between 7-9 years of age. He put up with it though, tried to hide it. A lot of people were worried about him. He says one time he went somewhere away from home without money, he was stuck there. He doesn't recall why he went that day, but he was pressed to do so. He tried calling but hadn't even enough to call. The trains, the buses... he felt pushed aside, brushed aside. He hung out with four girls for a while and chatted, and felt this was a good place to stay until he had money - at a picnic table, sheltered. The girls stayed with him, one - Tanya - offered him a place in her home, but he didn't want to lead her on, and her home was small. Another of the girls was homeless for sure, one I'm not sure about. Two of them had homes. He liked the open air feeling, but he was SO worried about his family. Especially his Mother. He felt he disappointed her and he apologizes. It was not her fault. He loved the mountains in the distance, snowy mountains. I think the Rockies.
He sends hugs, love, adoration and admiration. He is with you, as all ghosts are with the ones they love. He is with you in your dreams - that is him, not just your mind. He wants to be sure you know his love is HUGE - "Fat" love! And now he is in the Fat Blue Sky - wandering the Earth and "beyond" with friends, family he knew while he was alive.. and "tons of new friends" he's met after his death.
Finally, and I think importantly:
He doesn't care about punishing those responsible for his death. He wants you to let go and love him again. Talk to him again, he's there.
PLEASE mail me if you are his friend or family, I have more private messages, at :
a r o ol u - dea d
c o n v e
r sat i
o n s@ yahoo . ca
Type those letters without spaces, I have to space it in order to avoid tons of spam mail. Include the hyphen!